OPEN MIC ENCORE III
November, 2003

 
Open Mic Encore I November, 2003

Open Mic Encore II November, 2003

As the wind swept my face
It grabbed my handkerchief made of lace.
 
As a tear left a trail
All of a sudden I started to wail.
 
The dreams, the thoughts were terrifying
of ending life, of dying.
 
I kissed my grandmother's cold cheek
it felt like ice on a windy week.
 
I bent down and took a deep breath
as I thought of all the times that we have left.
 
Just because she past away
does not mean that we can't play.

Lauren Oglesby

=0=

 HOSPITALS
MATTHEW WILSON

 

PEOPLE GO INTO HOSPITALS BECAUSE THEY ARE NOT RIGHT.
PUT ON A TROLLEY ON A CORRIDOR, HALF A DAY AND ALL NIGHT.
WAITING TO SEE A DOCTOR TO MAKE SURE WHAT YOU HAVE GOT.
HOURS PASS BY, STILL NOT SEEN THAT'S YOUR LOT-EVENTUALLY YOU GO
FOR AN X-RAY TO FIND OUT THE CAUSE OF YOUR PAIN-STILL NO DIAGNOSIS
ONLY WHAT IS YOUR AGE, WHERE DO YOU LIVE-WHAT IS YOUR NAME
BY THIS PROCESS AND NONSENSICAL RED TAPE-YOU APPEAR TO BE FINE
YOU WISH YOU HAD NOT VENTURED OR LED TO BELIEVE -THAT THE HOSPITAL
WOULD GET RID OF YOUR PAIN- BUT INSTEAD YOU WASTED ALL THOSE
HOURS AND WAS DECEIVED --I HOPE THAT I WILL NEVER COME BACK AGAIN
I WILL SIT AT HOME WITH ALL MY PROBLEMS AND PAIN-EVENTUALLY YOU
END UP ON A WARD AFTER ALL THIS TIME -JUST A FEW TESTS-THEN
YOU WILL BE FINE--ENDED UP STAYING LONGER THAN I SHOULD-I WISH
SOMEONE WOULD TELL ME THE TRUTH -WHETHER IT IS BAD OR GOOD.
NOT KNOWING IS THE WORSE THING THAT WORRIES ME MOST-I SAID TO THE
NURSE THAT I HAD -HAD-ENOUGH- I'm worse now-i have never felt as
rough-she said its up to you whether you stay or not-you will have
to sign against medical advice -that's your lot-your tests have
come back all right -you can go home this afternoon or to night
WAS I GLAD TO GET OUT OF THERE-WAS I-- COULD NOT GET MY CLOTHES
ON QUICK ENOUGH-TO SAY GOOD BY.

=0=
Feeble minds
touch upon feeble hearts
sucking out hope,
existence.
You look not to find.
But to appear.
A simple magicians trick
becomes a life or death matter.
Is it really the clown that you fear,
With his smile of knowledge?
Or the tear that trickles down your cheek
For reasons you wont admit.
By pretending to be afraid of material things
you are hiding your true terror
Self Existence.

LISA RENEE BREIER

=0=

you radiate darkness
never any light,
i'm shinning brighter now
i know that i am right
 
every selfish thing you do
influences others thoughts
dark ones never notice
bright ones feel the cold
 
this spiritual revelation
revealed the darkness in you
and the spiritual damage
that you left with me too.

alicia

=0=

SOUL LOST
Rachna
Soul lost in the dungeons of darkness
Where no light passes by
Have i been captured by my illusions of you?
Something quirks inside of me,
As days pass by.
You have gotta set me free as this could not be what i wanted
But the irony of things is what you don't want always comes in abundance
 
Either i can accept you or reject you
But i cant hide or run from you
All i wanted was what i never got
Could have been true but then reality got the better of it
Like a dying man waiting and wanting for the moment to arrive.

=0=

Savage Call
Adam Brough 

I hear the call of the stag within me.
Calling me to oneness with the wilderness.
To experience the thrill & fear of the chase.
Fierce fangs snap at my heals.
Cruel tines fight back, turning grey fur a dark scarlet.
Jaws hold firmly to my throat.
Breath coming shorter.
A blood tainted cough grips me.
Between me & my killer, impaled upon me comes a release.
Instincts no longer hold us back.
Our spirits bind together, releasing us of our fear or hunger of one another.
We were never foes.
Never hunter & hunted.
Just two brothers in this world, fulfilling our bond with the cycles of life & death.

=0=

This Is A Self Portrait
Will Watson
I am here i am now
Hiding
You can't see me
Behind this false conformity
In a generation of false profits and "kings"
In a time where there is no one to look up to
And nothing to look forward to
 
This Is A Self Portrait
 
I walk down my street
I smell the stench of poverty, conformity, stupidity
Men preach to me, the way it is, the way it was and the way it should be
In my head I scream for them to stop
But afraid to reveal my true self I clench my fists and agree
only to realize, I too carry the stench
 
This Is A Self Portrait
 
The streets with which i crawl
How i got here, I can not explain
People ask "how are you?"
DEPRESSED, ANGRY, SELF HATING
I answer "can't complain"
YES, I to carry the stench
 
This Is A Self Portrait
 
Homelessness is something to despise
I look at it with evil eyes
knowing I will never escape
I sit here in wait
I wait the inevitable
Mine and your fate
Death
I await here, where there is no entertainment 
And the judgments are severe
I sit thinking of a past that could have been
And a future that can not be seen
I to carry the stench
 
This Is A Self Portrait
 
Can it be
Yes this is me
A false conformity
Forever running the treadmill of life
Waiting the reapers scythe
That's all there is left to do now
I to carry the stench
=0=

WHO AM I?
by Teresa Kalen
 
i am someone else.
 
whoever i was before was not what
the people around me expected.
so i became someone else
to meet their expectations.
 
i am a chameleon
 
blending into whatever
environment i encounter.
 
i am a kaleidoscope
 
continuously changing
until i satisfy the viewer.
 
i am a puzzle
 
constantly shifting pieces
to reach an unknown solution.
 
who am i?
 
i don't understand the question,
=0=                                        

 

Oh Dear Lord
Jamie Ann Sims
The wind blown in every direction, it is much like life.
Although life can be such a challenge for we get lost in our own thoughts.
Therefore, we can make our lives a struggle or we will just do our best.
Some may just give up on life itself and the wind shall bring them in the direction with you Lord.
My prayers are said aloud and it is like the words were blown away because I had the feeling that the Lord did not hear me.
Why, would it be that you would not listen?
Oh dear lord, help me for I need you near.
Not just today but each passing day.
Oh, how I start to cry because I can not reach you at any time when I need you close.
Please, be with me and give me the strength to carry on.
Yes, it is that I ask not only for strength but courage too.
These shall make me strong when it is time for the wind to blow again and always to remain in your presence.

=0=

HEARTBREAK
Abhijit Bang

The thoughts of my sweet-heart in my mind lay,
I thought I would meet her some day.
The distance between us was great,
So it was impossible to get her date.
Between us there were many a thorn,
So, for a relationship it was difficult to be born.
I wanted to meet her and tell her a lot,
Of her, that's why, I always thought.
I wanted to meet her in any case,
I couldn't help even a day seeing her face.
One day I decided to meet her and tell her everything,
And to remove all the wrong ideas and the misunderstanding.
But then I came to know that to meet her was in vain,
As she was gone never to come back again.
Yes she was gone...! gone...!! gone......!!!
 

=0=

Swallowed
corey vaughan

Swallow the medicine, the burning arrow flies free
Youíre now alone in the forest, moon shadows
Tare and seek your soul, any medicine for me
 
The rush, pulsating through body and mind
On fire, the medicine hits like bullets
Or snake bites dreams become unkind
 
The burning tingles as you lay in a sweat
On soggy leaves under forest canopies
This medicine I regret
 
Find myself finding it again and again
Find myself in the woods with a broken arrow
No more friends no more life just sin
 
You and I alone in the woods, swallowed
=0=
WHAT ARE DREAMS
                      Amanda Sedlak
 
              When we lay ourselves to rest,
              And birds bow down their heads.
              Sleeping babes in towns below,
              Are dreaming in their beds,
 
              O' but what truly is a dream,
              But what we so desire.
              Upon awakening it burns ones chest,
              With hells one thousands fires.
 
              Dreams, they show you what you want,
              They're a gate way to you soul.
              And yet when you wake you realize,
              You might not reach your goals.
 
              To fear your dreams is to fear your soul.
              To fear what might not come true.
              For all in dreams are thoughts and hopes,
              You fear your dreams ,I fear for you.

=0=

 LIP SERVICE
JACK S. RIEMER

ONE OR THE OTHER I MUST SERVE
BY THE WAY YOU HAVE SOME NERVE
TO SAY A THING LIKE THAT TO ME
I SERVE NO ONE CAN'T YOU SEE
WAITING FOR MY LITTLE SLIP
HE JUMPS IN TO TAKE A GRIP
OF MY LITTLE SOUL I OWN
BUT MY SOUL AND I HAVE GROWN
FAR APART IT SEEMS LIKE YEARS
SINCE I'VE SHED ANY TEARS
OVER THEIR FIGHT FOR ME
I SERVE NO ONE CAN'T YOU SEE
WITH HIS LAUGH YOU WILL FREAK
HE IS SUCH AN EFFEN CREEP
WHAT THE DEVIL IS HE TRYING TO SELL
SATAN,
 YOU CAN GO TO HELL.

=0=

CRY OF THE BANSHEE
lynne browne
In the distance between the sounds,
of the gruesome cries.
I could hear the sound of the balalaika,
Trapped in a triangular life of pain
"My benedict my love"! I hear her cry,
as she wept tears of pain,
below the hanging tree....
 
She watched his flaccid body
Silhouetted by the moon,
millions and millions of galaxies
...so many more tears
And she looked to her gods
she cried to her satellite
"Take away this pain this night"!
Tomorrow after evensong and prayers.
 
She will remember, she will hate,
She will curse, she will bait,
She will control your fate!
 
She has no name, and yet so many,
She came for you along the line,
Your name rings out in her ears,
 
It will rain her tears the elders say,
"Get down on your knees, and please God
just pray"!
She may just pass you, you might escape
you'll feel the hairs rise on your nape,
She's coming to take control of your fate,
I hope you get your pastures green,
And in her tears, you remain unseen!!

=0=

HIGH
DAM ROBINSON
 
I got high with her highness on the dirtieth floor of a post shabby hotel, the midnight royale
The city and the beak were beatiní, taxi cabs and moon buggies beepiní, E kicked in as her legs fell carelessly, effortlessly apart.
 
Find myself snatchiní for her majesties pleasure, weíre amused and laughin' as the neon signs flashiní, comms towers pulsiní through ebony singed stars
 
Sparkles in mirrors from your crown cause shivers, my regal ridden body quivers with illegality, shamefully shimmering in ermine Iím freakin', I need to speed and leave.
 
Reach the bolted door, perceptions all changed I gotta get out of this face, never mind what the butler saw man Iím sore, junk makin' me nervy and raw
 
Stumble stinkiní into the hall, ignoriní her majesties call. Haunted, hunted by decrepit falls into feather-down carpets and psychedelic stripes.
 
Iím out into fresh air which hits the moment guilt and shame kick my ass into the gutter, snipiní, gripiní, gaspiní, frightened.
 
But man what have I done? Slept with a woman that wanted me too. Got high, drifted by, smiled and felt good and at ease and at peace with my peaceful woman.
 
Took some time out for love and a few dozen royal treatment f*cks, aw shucks.
 
Get over it, just another small erosion a minor explosion, shit it ainít like I raped a servant in the shadow of Vesuvius, it was just us, willing, wet and high.

=0=

DIETY  
Rene' Sorel 
Please find me
Lost and introverted
Continuously searching for my quotient
Always to no avail
Feeling as though I have been totally marooned by hope
Left here to fend for myself
Unable to revive the same zest for living which I once possessed
My faith has become numb
I cannot trod along with the blind flock
My mind frame has become too sophisticated
For I would rather never have the definite answer as to why I am here
Than to have some hustler in a pulpit force feed me the meaning of life
It seems as though I do not even know who you are anymore
Perhaps I never did
Abandonment.

=0=

There is a Thumping Gorilla in me,
With Rebellious Fists of Rage!
On the fourth of June, he pounces out of me and prowls the streets.
by midnight, he is back in me, EXACTLY where he should be.
By this time, i have tamed this beast with all of my might.
This Ferocious Mammal lives in my Fists.
To any fool who dares to approach me, Shall come out with many broken bones
if they come out at all...
I am no Jester.
Do not make cruel jokes towards me.
Bad omens shall fall upon those who do so
My Fist full of Gorilla is ready to explode at any second,
So stay as far away from me as you can.
This Ferocious animal makes me want to Demolish.

Joshua Yves Williams

=0=

TRAPPED IN FEAR
MEGAN BROOKE
 
I see happy faces everywhere,
When i look in the mirror,
all i see is a smear,
that rushes thru my brain,
the pain of guilt and fear,
it`s like i`m the driver,
and don`t know how to steer,
one day it`ll get old,
just like i soon will,
old and raggedy,
still smeared in fear,
but what if the fear goes away now?
will i just cease and disappear?
disappear as a whole,
or just in spirit?
if my heart stops now,
i`d like one last request,
a wish that my family could be the best,
the best they can be,
inside and out,
stay true to themselves,
even in doubt.

=0=

Lucky Me
Chris Jensen
Crumbling, Falling Apart
Hoping for a brand new start
Fearing that, which that i shouldn't
Not knowing what to say, Even if i did, I wouldn't
Never having the right amount of tolerance
Always feeling the need to distance
 
Wishing to find that special place
Wanting to find that healing grace
Yearning for that special someone
Only knowing that i have no one
Sometimes i feel so overtaken
Thinking of that dream, where i do not awaken
 
Fun-filled memories, fading fast
This feeling of hope, away i cast
I think of you, what should be us
Increasing lust, broken trust
Feeling so shameful, so unjust
I need to forget you, this is a must
 
Weak in the knees, you'll never know why
Asking for forgiveness, Receiving no reply
My darkest secrets, in you i do confide
Without you, i have no place to hide
Joy and happiness, shed away by tears
Calming was your voice, away it took my fears
Silent are these halls, because you are not here
Broken is my heart, never will it heal
Fading are these memories, Good times that we had
Knowing that you are gone, Feeling Cold, Depressed, and Sad

=0=

Slip beneath without a trace,
Maybe they wont notice,
When I leave this place,
Fall inside to see
Theres nothing inside of me,
I can not seem to break this trend
I ask myself will this ever end,
Why fall to the ground
When I've already fallin down,
Just keep it bottled up inside,
Sooner or later I'll break down an cry
Let the darkness fill the room,
I cant get out of it,
I cant resume,
Just gotta tell myself it will be ok,
Maybe it will be better when I leave this earth,
ONE DAY
jake

=0=

Emotions
saisha
Misery claims me,
thoughts maim me
make me want to be
something different than I see.
 
Anger explodes inside
a part of me still wants to hide
life seems to be a roller coaster ride
but my eyes are finally open wide.
 
Sadness and sorrow are all around
bombshells explode onto the ground
I hear mourning and weeping sounds
as the dead are piled in a mound.
 
Envy; jealousy-the worst of all
lower me when I need to stand tall
surrounding me are crumbling walls
of days past, civilizations that fall.
 
But when weíre ready to shout
letís not leave out,
what the good ones are all about.
 
Glory grows with the heart
loving is the best start
when your soul is pierced by the dart
and you finally find your missing part.
 
Joy and careless days,
carry us through life in so many ways
we build around ourselves a maze
and mislead others with lying haze.
 
Happiness comes with the dawn
or in the shape of a favorite song
it feels like being toughed by a wizardís wand
something with which everyone can always bond.

=0=

TORN
Scorp
I woke up in a cold sweat,
tired and exhausted... worn out of life
The room was dark and full of silence
My breath was the only motion around
The nightmare was fading away
My vision was all blurred and gray
I had no idea of how I got here
My memory was gone empty and clear
My mind was racing with thoughts
Adrenaline was pumping through my aching veins
I could still feel the drugs flowing with my blood
The feeling of loneliness took over me
Sweat was pouring all over my face
I needed to get out of this place
I couldn't believe I'd carry on this far
but no...
Not without another scar
Surrounded by misery and pain
Looking at another blood stain
... I was a man with no purpose
I had no intentions
I had no reasons
My world was turning red
and all I had is tears to be shed
God, I was supposed to be dead
... supposed to be dead

=0=

My everlasting
 
I died;
So long ago;
Glimpses of shadowed memories,
Embody my solitary reality.
 
The aura of the mist,
After a storm;
The scent of fresh roses
In the rain;
Faint, soothing, gentle rain,
Oh to feel alive again.
 
Time goes by deliberately ;
As this purgatory drifts
Into a dark eternity.
Heaven, I know, is never so glorious;
And hell, well, I've sensed greater
Glory and dignity
Than pain and torment.
 
Several beauties will burn;
With colors, breathe taking as the sunset;
Or exhilarating as the sunrise;
Will forevermore know release.
 
My immortal will one day
Disperse its colors;
Through the wind
As I will breathe in all depths
Of the world.
 
Some day, I will know release;
If ever you feel the wind;
Brush unknown colors of my immortal
Through your hair;
As the water trickles
perfectly down your face;
It will be a sign;
Even though I am dead,
The world will begin
To sense my ungodly colors,
As an always and everlasting
Awakening.
 
*vp*

=0=

Fly Bird
Lou 

Day twenty seven, I look out the window, the same bird at the same tree drifting in the wind.
Overcast, I like it that way, the sky is always blue, but overcast teems with swirling life.
And when it rains, oh the beauty of it.
It rained the day before, the tree whipping back and forth, dramatized by itís height.
The bird was gone hiding six floors below safely, it and I were dry.
Dry and yet cold as I lay there, just as before all the days before.
The pain was my shadow, waiting beside, inside me, a curiosity at first, but now just a shadow.
I lay there in bed, my bed, Iíd been there a month barely leaving it.
I couldnít leave it, invisible chains of ill held me down.
My body weak with starvation couldnít hold a book, or draw the bird in the tree.
I lay there starving, motionless, with my shadow watching that sweet bird swaying in the wind.
I had no food or even water, it could hurt me, my fragile state, like beating the dead.
My source of life was fed through a tube into my heart.
Before I couldnít stand the odor of anything, the sent of food carried on everyone and everything.
Now I lived to breath the air from the hall, food the nurses hide from me, overwhelming with pleasure, a taste of the past.
I wasnít hungry anymore, my stomach gave up, I had nothing coming why desire it?
Starving, motionless, longing, I lay there with artificial life being pumped into my heart.
I could see my bones, their curves and grooves, my muscles were gone, it hurt to move my legs.
I smiled as it began to rain, the bird looked at me and flew away, he shall return, he always did.
Tonight it will be different, tomorrow Iíll fly or fall, but it will be over.
The nurse came in, she did every night, she brought my plastic bags of life, she always looked happy and I thank her for that.
She smell like curry, her husband made it, he made food smell wonderful.
She had something far sweeter than life, she brought me blood, I have too little, I couldnít fly without more.
The blood enters me, I owe another my life, Iím in debt three times over, thank you all.
I feel it curse through me, a burst of energy, I would have sat up, but I was busy.
Busy in preparation, I had to fly, she brought me antibiotics, ten of them, I was allowed water.
I was so dry, I hadnít realized, did you know water is as sweet as honey?
But the pills, they hurt, my stomach wasnít ready, it hurt, so heavy and the burn, it filled me.
Laying motionless, burning, wanting to starve again with fake life, but I am going tomorrow, leaving the bed one way or another.
The burn fades to dull ache and she returns, I need more antibodies, these are injections.
I do not cry or scream or fear, I was covered with needle holes, I stopped counting the blood tests
Into the muscles along my back, but tomorrow I would be free, what is pain now?
She says kind words and leaves, no more curry just sterilizer, the rain was beating the window, the bird was gone, and I smiled.
Open Mic Encore I November, 2003

Open Mic Encore II November, 2003

 

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