OPEN MIC ENCORE III
It all began when I was lead in my spirit to help a friend.
Before I could ponder on this notion the situation at hand was
so dire, being motivated by a caring heart and desire to help
those in need it never occurred to me this would be used against
me because of someone elses personal vendetta sparked by envy and
greed. Many have said it does not pay to be nice to those who
no gratitude for what you do for them and have asked me why I
helping people despite how mean they have been to me they just
understand it's a spiritual connection I have nothing in my heart
love and affection a sincere desire to help the less fortunate,
what the world considers homeless, unloved, abandoned, they are
people I'm just one of his many living vessels chosen for this task.
Gone was my souls guide so I did walk blind in a land of fools
so intoxicated on my own special brew that I had become sick
block the path to love did I with self loving
sealed the road back did I with self loathing
Twisted metal of my hearts captor my feeble head could not free
I fell into prison when I fell into her
stripped of all reason I err in this, sometimes devoid of all compassion I lay
waste to your bliss, most foul of thieves I stoleyour trust, but love
you I do and love you I must
I am as Hepheastus when cast from you, burned twisted, and ugly, in my minds
deeds, like Prometheus with pain dissapated when I sleep, renewed when I
awake! You like Thetis, born of sea foam and pearls have captivated me, temper
my rage and love m, my inspiring muse, let me be at your side henceforth
you made me
believe in we.
the sharp dagger
from betrayed trust,
my believe in you.
Strong and independent woman,
Healer of the hurt
you never knew my heart.
Has anyone ever found out the meaning of life
Will anyone ever find out,
It kills the heart inside,
I need to scream and shout.
Iíve experienced pain, is this life
Meningitis at a very young age,
I want to know what life is,
I feel trapped in a cage
Love and passion, no such thing for me,
Iíve never experienced a passionate kiss
One day I hope to receive,
But for now though, itís missed.
Friends, lots of mistakes made here,
You can never trust one, even if youíve known them for years,
If you do, youíve got to be careful,
Otherwise, just like me, youíll end up in tears.
I look at myself in a mirror,
I sometimes feel like stabbing myself with a knife,
What do I see in this mirror?
I see the mirror of life.
You cannot see this cage i'm in - The pain it comes from deep within - You
cannot feel the air around - closing in and holding down - You do not smell
or taste defeat - that lingers on for weeks and weeks - You do not hear the
symphony - of betrayal, hate and jealousy - You would not know of sad and
low, - to turn your back, and just let go - Your wounded soul has disbelief
- that there's a real me underneath.
-=The Spiker Effect=-
Lost in confusion. Lost in myself. Spending each night with worries and my
strife.Never knowing where to go,where to start,or where it ends.
These nights are so damn slow; Tossing and turning w/endless night fever.
Give me cancer now lord! Come for me Grim Reaper! I wish these feelings
would already end! If hell didnt exist, i'd leave all my friends.... Driving
home at nights on Rt 79, and all this anger that just builds up inside. Just
Wishing Sometimes i'd drive off that bridge. What the hell do i care if i
die or if i live. I wanna KaMayAhMayAh this lame world in fear. Make the
world suffer! Make them cry those tears! Fear the Reaper? Fear the Spiker!
This mind is more dangerous then any can fathom. Lock it back up before
someone commits me. Peace out my bitches, its time for the new me. Rath,
Hate, Revenge, Unstayb--------bull is my mind. Murder these bitches. The
world i will bind! i will bend! i will contort! Ruleing is my desire!
Hatered is my sort.......of power i crave. Sweeping kaos across the lands,
NEW ROADS i will pave! >:P Destruction i will cause. Ending all life!
Time will suddenly pause. Moving l!
ands and families, As i demonstrate my powers. No longer these
emotions, for they are overtaken by my zealous desires!
Alas my nights are over, the sun's rise back in affect. Another day of sain
Spiker, locking down the true feelings of "the Spiker Effect."
I Hate the world
I hate you
I hate the way you make me feel
I hate how you make me hate the world
I hate how you make me feel in this world
and this is just another emotional song
about a girl whos at rock bottom.
-how do you get up when there is no hand to help you?
-how do you believe when you cant find a reason to?
can you tell me
How do i live?
Where do i begin
a life full of sin
and i couldn't care less
rip open my heart where you have it
at its best
bare and ready to tare
cold from the lies you told
and i believed...oh i believed
and this is just another emotional song
about a girl who's been broken
-how do you revive a heart that has died?
-how do you cry when your tears have gone dry?
can you tell me
how do i survive?
and this is just another emotional song
just another reason
just another lie
i believed in
you're just another friend
I have left behind.
Wondering why my feelings change
Wondering why I think youíre strange
But I loved you just yesterday
Hoping that allís not lost
Hoping I donít pay the cost
Of my transformed mind
Thinking Iím a disgrace
Thinking Iím a hopeless case
My thoughts coincide with what I see
Though I have things to regret
Though I had no reason to fret
I wasnít subtle as I chattered
Visions of what I believe
Visions that I see
Come alive as I regress
Feelings of whatís to come
Feelings of whom Iíve become
I wonder why I feel this way
Never had to worry
Never had to hurry
But my lifeís a mess
Things are changing
My lifeís rearranging
Just need time to sort my feelings
And then start dealing
Not The Same
This open door has shut you out,
no more pain to talk about
The feathers fell from the sky
the night you kissed my soul good-bye
You let me go, you let me walk
you did your thing, you sure can talk
I tried to stay, I tried to mend
But my heart was broken, twisted friend
Now you pray above at my stone
from my grave, leave me alone
Don't you see you did this all!
You walk off and you stand tall.
You saw me that night in the room
watched the blood drip so soon
Expecting I would sure survive
I saw your face I saw those eyes
Now I'm gone and you just pray
to give you back one more day
It's sad you watched me die
it's sad I'm done with no life
Feel sorry for yourself, I know
you wish you stopped me...you wish you tried
one thing they told me up here you know
The sad are alive, the happy well, they died
A simple thing called life,
To me it is a game of chess,
To make one sacrifice,
Turns into one huge mess,
Your father says he understands,
Your mother fills you with guilt,
Try to take matters in your own hands,
And destroy everything you built,
Then you try to recover,
Knowing that it will be tough,
To help, your parents bug you,
As if looking in the mirror isnít enough,
My life and family are torn,
But Iím not giving up on it,
I was never asked to be born,
But I guess I lucked up on it,
Everyday a lot is at stake,
And if this is what is called life,
I call STALEMATE!!!
Now I leave you at good~bye,
Close my eyes and wish to die.
If I die within my sleep,
Don't cry, no tears, don't whine now weep.
Here I go my time is done,
Don't be sad we had some fun.
Watch me in the dark
Hold me while I sleep
Calm my lifeless beating heart
Disintegrate all disconsolate
Sweet, Guardian angel of mine.
It's tearing me apart
The despairing thought of loosing,
Your assuasive presence
Sweet, Guardian angel of mine.
Wipe all confusion
From my troubled mind
Carry me away,
From this Prolonging sorrow
Recreate this Imperfect mind
sweet, Guardian angel of mine.
IF I DIED
By Kellie Tinney
If I died would anyone be there
I wonder who would even care
If I died would you be sad
Or would you just be glad
If I died would anyone cry
Or even wonder why I wanted to die
If I died would you be happy
Or spend the rest of your life unhappy
If I died would I see the light
Or spend eternity in fright
If I died before my time
Do you think that would be such a crime
If I died in my sleep
I wonder if you would weep
If I died by my own hand
Do you think that you could stand
If I died tomorrow
Would you feel any sorrow
I wonder do I dare
I am not sure I even care
THE TRUTH BEHIND YOUR EYES
I see it all
Never wanting anyone to see
The life of insecurities you hold
I see it all
But never out loud
Never the thoughts you hold dear
Always waiting for people
For them to judge
To break you down
I see it all
In the way you act
Not wanting those to know
To know your scared
Of what they think
I see it all
All in your tears
In your eyes
All of it
In the truth behind your eyes
THE BEST PLACE IN THE WORLD
Like a billion arrows aiming for one target
They all come together good, bad, happy or sad
They all come together, as one
This is the best place in the world
A room with closed widows where no sound comes in
The emptiness is packed now
The spaces are filled with thoughts
No room left to do anything but think
It's ok to cry
Everybody does it
Let the tears run slow
It'll all be passed in a few moments
This is the best place in the world
A room with closed windows where no sound comes in
Blood and Harm
By: Jordan Haynes
When everyone leaves
Like you know they will
You lose all
And pain starts to drill
Deep, dark and desolate
Behind the lies
Your silent cries
Are trapped in the blade
That rips through your arms
Blood and harm
You are welcomed to another land worse that it seems.
You entered there by yourself, sometimes you cant get back.
You didn't know what would be on the other side but you took the chance.
NEVER SAY GOODBYE
NEVER SAY GOODBYE, NEVER SAY GOODBYE,
ANY SITUATION MAY STANDBY,
BUT NEVER SAY GOODBYE.....
LIFE MAY BE FULL OF TENSIONS,
MAY BE THE LIFE IS FULL OF FRUSTRATIONS,
BUT ALWAYS TRY TRY AND TRY,
NEVER SAY GOODBYE......
SITUATIONS WILL COME AND SITUATIONS WILL GO,
DON'T BE A COWARD SO,
THAT YOU FEEL LOST BATTLE OF LIFE,
THAT YOU DON'T WANT TO BE ALIVE,
FOR SURE YOU WILL GET A RELIEF'S SIGH
NEVER SAY GOODBYE.....
IT'S A MESSAGE FROM MY SIDE,
TO EVERYONE WHO MIGHT BE THINKING TO END COMPETITION OF SURVIVAL IN LIFE,
WHO WOULD BE THINKING TO SUICIDE,
NEVER SAY GOODBYE......
Standing all alone in the dark wondering were I went wrong. sitting by the
phone but, no one ring's. Feeling empty because I'm standing all alone
yea,that's me.Noone understanding this pain that has come upon me. Things were
said,things were done but,in the end I'm standing all alone.My heart is broken
to know that my life will never be the same because, I'm standing all alone
and there is no one who I can phone. It seems like my heart has been struck.My
cloudy days are back and look at me I'm standing here all alone and someone
has stabbed me in the back.Yeah,that's me waiting for someones rain to wash
all of this pain away. Wondering why this is happening to me.In the end I will
be standing ,standind all alone , yeah that's me.
feelin spaced over a distance. kisses
only temporary to hold you
till next time longin missin lustin for
the others touch
lovers grief that is it.
she sits all alone; there is no one around
she is tied to something she cannot see
where to go? what to see?
the whole world is outside waiting
Yet, still she sits all alone
no matter what choice she makes
its all the same
day after day she says the same things
nobody is there to listen
she only sees what she chooses
all around she is haunted by ghosts of the past
just reminding her all is lost
not yet, she thinks, not all is lost yet
her future laid out like a red carpet
just waiting to be walked
but no, not alone
Life from my eyes is when I walk down the street; I look and see all these
little kids dress so dirty or sometimes looking so hungry.
Looking outside grown men busting windows or even shooting another brother
just because of the colors they wear.
See teenager girls carrying infants or even a couple of months late.
See bums on the street begging for some change here or there, but people act
as if they don't care.
Thinking to my self why in the hell is they acting this way?
If I was to have a baby today.
Would I, Should I let he or she be born in this environment today.
Dirty streets, Drugs, or even Poverty, Gun shoots here or there.
Should I, Would I even live to see judgment day, If I died tomorrow, would
anyone care, even if I get shoot in the head I know that everyone would stare
but there would be no tears.
I know that there day would be full of joy , but my life is to bare.
My life is sometimes joyful when my eyes aren't full of tears.
But since I stay up crying over Should I, Would I ever just stand up and face
my fears, or should I jhust stay in my tears.
Should I, Would I leave and never come back go far away so I may hop on the
right track or even hop on the track of a dead end if so I'll never come back.
BUT SINCE MY LIFE HAS FINALLY COME TO AN END THIS POEM WAS LEFT UNTITLED...
Beauty is skin deep
Beauty runs deep.
Thereís more to a lady that just a pretty face.
I feel that true beauty comes from within.
The quality of beauty creates diversions in my mind.
It all begins with confidence.
Any woman of color is beautiful to me.
Itís an essence.
Intelligence is an element of being beautiful.
Personality makes you who you are as a person.
But, classiness can define you as elegant.
Beauty and feminine grace is written in a womanís walk.
Each dainty step flows like epic poetry.
And I want to write down every word, if only to capture your essence for a
Itís in her posture and in her stance.
There is no greater compliment to beauty.
To me inner beauty is captivating.
A lady is a perfectly wonderful creature, made by god.
I recognize the real meaning of beauty.
Your distinctive style varies from day to day.
To be beautiful is to let the soul become visible.
Beauty expresses itself differently in every woman.
The way you carry yourself with dignity is beautiful.
Your mind is another part of you.
The beauty of a woman signifies artistry.
When you come in contact with a man never let him bring you down by giving you
low self esteem and saying to you that you arenít beautiful.
Say it with pride.
Be happy of what youíre.
Being beautiful doesnít necessarily have to be drop dead gorgeous itís all
about how you see
In Memory of my Grandpa Steve
God, why did he have to leave so soon?
He meant my life to me.
He would always wrap me up in his caccoon.
If you could only see.
Every Monday we'd go to the auction
and look at all the cattle,
and sometimes I'd even ride the horse saddle.
He was the cowboy of my dreams,
or that's as so it seems.
When I see the rain fall from the sky,
I know it's my grandpa,
herding the cattle way up high.
I wish I could erase this all from my mind,
but I can't just let it all fall behind.
He was only 54,
and I guess it was time to shut his
I have felt pain more than once!
It hurts so much you just want to die.
That's if you haven't already from the pain!
Your heart shattered into a million pieces,
pieces you can never put back together.
It hurts more than anything else!
You feel so empty.
Nothing can fix the pain.
Not even loving again!
Because that's what usually causes it!
You can be pretty.
You can be skinny.
You can have anything you've ever wanted in life,
but the pain never goes away!
It follows you everywhere!
As soon as you start to forget its there,
it reminds you!
It doesn't let you sleep.
It doesn't let you laugh.
It only makes you cry,
until you just go insane.
How can something so small as pain,
end your life forever?
You try to be happy,
but the pain is always there!
You try to repair your heart,
but the pain won't let your forget.
And it's all because you let yourself love!
Sometimes the pain is so bad,
that it feels like a hundred knives,
stabbing at you!
You become scared,
you don't want to do anything,
but stay in bed and cry!
The pain has ended your life!
And it's all because. . .I loved you!
THE WAR WITH ME:
how o how did life bring me here?silly
question to ask,
it was i who held the reins!must be my
own worst enemy...
so full of pride n disdain,small
pleasures of life mattered least,
tonight i fight just to breathe free!
an executioner i turned out to be,and a
good one for i strived!!
an unforgivable sinner,of my dying
still fighting,for some secret saviour,
that i wish lies within...
denial, my only escape....
bitter sweet truths of life've all
wounded i stand,deceit my final
staring into nothingness wondering if i
can still see?
crippled by the blind plunge,i'm
wandering these depths
still learing how to fall....
my pain,my plight;pity me not,for tonight
i still fight,
me, my own worst enemy!!!!
The dawn is slowly breaking through
The sun must trade places with the moon.
We creatures of the night must quickly depart
Fot the hateful light and bursts of bright
Will take our wings away from flight.
As we cower, our minds are still swirling with power
Yet we understand sunlight is our poison,
Bitter and sour.
Our bodies will be destroyed,
Our soft flesh devoured.
We have to move quickly
Back into dark hours.
Our windows painted black
Doors locked & latched,
We hide from the day
And the comfort it lacks.
We duck into our lair
And in it we crouch,
So as not to be seen by the suns evil glare.
We reminisce of our night,
Of our dangerous fights
And wondrous sights.
Of the beauty we beheld
Looking into eyes so full of fright
'Till we all, one by one,
Lay our heads down to rest.
For the dusk will soon come,
And our sharp fangs we shall bless.
The thick red blood of a mortal
Will transfer our energy to a powerful portal
Where we are invincible,
Where we cannot be touched
Until, once again, the sun will rise
And we will once again run
Away from Gods eyes.
March 25th, 2003
behind your soul.
Everytime I see you walk
brings joy to my heart
and everytime i hear you talk
all my fears they fall apart
i still have faith
my hopes and dreams
but its to late
i've seen your schemes
can't look back
can't take a step further
The sky turns black
when were together
Time to let go
move on and find another
then this is
As surely as the sun will set upon me very soon
As surely as the rise of yet another distant moon
As surely as the moon will call for the ocean tide
To once again rise and fall another night I've cried
As surely as the stars will shine throughout the night again
As surely as you once were mine my lover and my friend
As surely as the rain will fall upon my soul today
Tears of rain I can't control is what I mean to say
As surely as all these things are so very true
Please believe me when I tell you dear my heart was made for you
Please believe me when I say I apologize
And only you and you alone can dry these saddened eyes
John Clyde Moya III
THE NEW DAWN
What to do; what to say
When things just won't go my way
How to relieve the stress inside
When I'm told I should have so much pride
The biggest challenge ever known
When every day I spend alone
No one to turn to; no one to call
My existance seems invalid in all
Years wandering, searching to find
One simple ease or peace of mind
Frustration and anger don't travel far
Resentment and sadness locked in a jar
With all emotions bottled inside
I travel my mind with nothing to hide
To share with others is useless to me
For all I want is to finally be free
On my mind and heart the world seems to feast
It seems simple to ask for a minute of peace
My wish remains ungranted as I hold on
All I can do is wait for the new dawn.
Never meant to be written
This is the one of those poems
never meant to be written,
one of those
never meant to be seen,
without rhymes and amphigories
and form, oh dear, not
it`s its own author and audience
this is the one of those poems
without questions and answers,
without feelings, followers, message
pure negation of a poem
in fact, this poem
is never meant to be written,
will never be forgotten.
Slip under the covers of
You will find the warmth
My world will wrap you in
Letting you glide into my
We can stay in this
Faraway from the mundane
Until the sweetness
And you never want to
Endless, the length
Only hope has strength
an eternity's tearfully
wishing for lovely
love, peace, Silent
Silent, the sound
to hatred, to hound
the merriest trace of mind
any happy kind
Endless, and Silent
the ways of hope
When dreaming, i think of them and me,
when running away, i use my mind aswell as feet,
When i close my eyes, nite closes in,
dark clouds arrive, and the the nitemares begin.
TO LIVE OR TO DIE???
You have your hopes and your dreams and in the dark you wanna glow,
you want fulfillment and family, live life and grow old.
When u force a crash or jump, u have chosen suicide,
but, "you were involved in an accident", then you see your
Failed hanging or overdose becomes "he wants attention",
SEE the pain, the suffering, the UN-RELINQUISHED aggression!
'Goodnite people', think its time to say goodbye,
You should be trying to live, unless ur just living to die.
left in a room full of people.
but i'm all alone
voices whispering but know ones their
chattering of teeth but
know ones their.
where am i? am i alive?
The Frozen Bird
I want a new love
I want a love, like a new season
A loving season that grows over and consumes the last's glory
Why can't we venture for new love?
Why must you and I be tethered down
To the bleakness of winter?
We are not traitorous or deceitful to want to journey towards the warmness
We, like birds yearn for the beauty of spring
It is not fickle of us to long for the comfort of a new loves heat
Though I still love now, I hate my love's lulls through time
Though I hunger relentlessly,
I am frequently put out by my winter love's placidness
I want, no I crave for spring love
I am consumed with want for freshness
I pray for winter to flee
And for spring to last forever with all its splendor
I love, yet I don't love
I hate, yet I ache for new love
I wish to melt ice with spring
My new love, though unaware
Has shown me the frost that I have been laden with by winter
Spring, melt me and cover me with the warm dew
Of my new love
For I, like a helpless bird, can only fly so far from coldness
Before again being entrapped by winter
Why love, don't you come?
Yet again, Why don't I fly?
A BITTER SWEET END
Hanging overhead like the weighty sword of demacles
The all encompassing black cloud that swirls around you
It creeps up silently behind you without warning
Everywhere u turn its there, inescapable
its whispering tones like an icey wind
its presence consumes your very being
chilling you to the bone
then all at once its hands rest upon you bring an inner calm and peace
enveloping you like the warm loving arms of a mother round her newborn
the sweet caress of death
open your self again and
let the world sink in
watch as it violates you
probing you for hidden truths
twisting them into lies
making you another cog in its design
let it dehumanize you
slowly eroding truth
creating another mannequin
another victim of emptiness
struck down by your hollow gift
wishing it was able to fit
in the mold in its mind
but wait buy your salvation inside
we'll show you how to reside
in this world of mirrors and lies
Alone in the Darkness
i feel lost and trapped,
scared and alone,
does ne1 care?
i feel like im getting no where
what is the point of this?
do ppl want 2 make me suffer?
they obviously do.
they treat me like im worthless,
they keep me out of the light where joyous things happen,
they throw me in the dark where cruel depressing stuff happens,
i guess im meant 2 b there.
but sumtimes when ur in the dark w/o ne1 2 care about u,
u get sad and lonley and feel cold and trapt.
i wish i could escape in2 the light where there are many people who
would care ,
bc being alone sux,
and thats how i always feel.
As I stumble through the battlefield of life
With ruts and trenches filled with the bodies of so many
Jagged holes torn in my chest
All I want is to rest
Blood pools in the street
Covering my feet
I fall to my knees
Another bullet rips through my body
My gun slips from my blood soaked fingers
Everything goes black
Iím finally home
To eternal rest
Silent with a steady white eye,
maggots munch on a carcass pie.
Limp muscles never will move,
As he silently moves to his own groove.
Blood tears flowing fast,
A bleeding heart pumping to the last.
Slowly settled in the dirt,
never again will be hurt.
His eyes will never see another day,
because in the ground, he will forever stay.
Life of a Girl
she just sat there
All by herself in her lonely heart
she sat there wondering when its all going to end
she's sitting there in her darkness
wondering when she's going to put and end to it
She's laying there now
she's accomplished what she's always wanted
But what is the use now that she's not there to celebrate
She would of sat there
In her lonely heart..
In her darkness
But she doesn't need to anymore..
a walking mantra , burning
senses tree foam in the context
inlaid with glass roots running deep,
and still beneath the tide i seem to be
to relentlesly reside,
rapture spine caught in the paper traps,
and an ink stain graces the eye.
rusty gate and withered hands,,,the face
that rearranges my thought train
on first sight,
the outcome of the snake collision,
appleseeds and blurry vision.
no less the sensation motivated,
silly slick my jumper cables,,faulty,
open rites i hold the time,
reflecting soldier stares without a contest
and reflexation to punctuate
so i simply close the gate,,,,,,,,,,,,,
In the garden of simple nakedness and good
of innocence and serene ignorance,
You seductively slithered past
holding my attention,
igniting an insatiable inferno of curiosity.
Your smooth, empowering confidence
penetrated my tingling, silent body
like electric currents,
while my entranced eyes feasted
upon the marvelous mystique
and beauty of your movement.
The familiar cacophony of the garden
that I once welcomed and delighted in,
seemed eerily distant and distracting now
against your sweet, hypnotic lullabies
full of promises and hope,
forgotten tunes of happiness.
A provocative lap dance for the soul
tantalizing my desires,
luring me out of the garden
and into your dazzling, irresistible world.
What an annoyance
what disgrace in all place
Time to break the weed
He'll say he's in need
those callous words
a ploy in time a baker can burn
such a disgrace
in all the amazing grace
tended to strike the light
before cover him it might
strike out the light
that shone so bright
and set his foolishness alight
better be in the dark
OPEN MIC ENCORE I MARCH, 2004
OPEN MIC ENCORE II MARCH, 2004
Poems copyright ©
designated authors 2004.
Page Copyright © AHApoetry.com 2004.
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